


Final Breakthru

by Mother_Mercury



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blow Jobs, Falling In Love, Friends to Lovers, M/M, NSFW, Porn with Feelings, Roger is smart, Romance, Smut, brian is insecure, handjobs, roger is definitely (not) straight, this falls apart in the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2019-09-29
Packaged: 2020-11-07 18:14:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20821661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mother_Mercury/pseuds/Mother_Mercury
Summary: Brian and Roger are best mates. Brian is openly gay and getting his PhD. Roger is straight, unless he strikes out then he ends up in Brian's bed. Brian wants more from Roger but every time Roger leaves his bed he reminds him "not even gay, mate".orBrian is insecure. Roger is definitely (not) Straight. They wank each other off.





	Final Breakthru

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this when I was drunk. Insecure Brian is my favorite. sue me.

Brian and Roger met in primary school and had remained best mates since. The duo rented a flat together while they attended Uni in London. It was a crappy flat, the water barely ever got warm enough to take a 5 minute shower, the walls were thin, the heat never worked, the list was basically never ended. But they didn't care, they were just happy to be living together. They knew each other for years and wouldn't want to live with anyone else. They were the type of mates who could play scramble for hours, laughing, knocking back a few beers, while taking the piss out on each other. They were also the kind that could fight over just about everything anything. Brian was constantly getting on Roger picking up after himself, controlling his temper, focusing on his studies, and just about everything else. Roger complained that Brian needed to relax more, stop being so stuck up, and needed to get laid more often.

"Let's go out tonight, find us some naughty girls and be naughty boys!" Roger would beg Brian.

"Eh, maybe another time. Too much course work." Brian would use as an excuse. Brian knew it would only take him maybe two hours tops but he had no interest in girls. 

Eventually Roger caught on and finally after pestering a few times he finally got it out of him. When he told Roger he preferred blokes Roger responded with the most Roger response.

"Alright then, I'll find a naughty girl and you find a naughty boy, and we can still be naughty boys." he said wiggling his eyebrows at the curly haired man.

Brian realized he was gay the first week of Uni and Roger always knew he was straight, or so he said. Brian focused on his studies and occasionally slipping off to a gay pub to chat a nice bloke up now and then. While Roger focused of sleeping with girls and occasionally slipping off to the library to study for his exams. Roger never wanted anything serious with these girls, just a good time. He tried to get Brian into the one night stand scene but he always declined. He preferred chatting a nice bloke, having a couple drinks, and maybe having a nice make out session. If he thought they were nice he would ask them on a date like the gentleman he was. That doesn't mean that Brian was innocent. He like every other male like, no loved, sex. 

He wanted a relationship. Brian assumed no one wanted a relationship with him and he didn't spark anyone's interest. He assumed people thought he was quite dull sometimes when he constantly talked about space and science. He looked at his pale and lanky body and knew people wanted tan and toned. Whenever he put himself down, Roger was always there to correct him. Roger told him he was smart and interesting. Roger told him was terribly jealous of his length. Brian never took him seriously, that was Roger's job as his best mate. Also, Roger was a living breathing angel in Brian's eyes. Brian knew Roger was beautiful, smart, talented, funny, and had a fit body. Roger could be in a relationship with anyone with the bat of his eyelashes, but he choose to sleep around and Brian would never understand. So maybe that was another reason why he wasn't in a relationship, Roger was straight and would never wanna be with him.

Brian had to move on from dreaming about kissing Roger's lips and holding his hand. He put himself out there and met a nice lad name Alan at a gay club. They went on a few dates and have done some hand stuff, nothing too serious. But Brian knew that was gonna change tonight after their 3rd date. But Brian thought to himself he should have known better than to get his hopes up. Brian sat at the restaurant waiting for 45 minutes but Alan never showed. He shamefully walked out of the restaurant and found himself crying. He put on his best blazer, he had some non space and science topics, and he even saved up enough to pay for both of their dinners. He didn't want to wallow in self pity, so he walked to the pub he knew Roger was at tonight to have himself a good time. 

Roger had struck out more times tonight than he was willing to admit to himself. He was off his game and he knew it. He also was blaming Brian. He was was nervous about Brian's date tonight. He wanted so much for Brian to be happy and to realize just how perfect and beautiful he is. Roger hoped Alan would treat him right because Roger knew how he would treat Brian if he had him. _FUCK, _Roger thought to himself. He really needed to stop thinking about how good Brian looked in his blazer and start thinking about that beautiful girl with the curly brown who kinda looked like Brian sitting at the bar. _FUCK i'm doing it again_, Roger thought to himself. He downed his beer and moved out of the booth and away from his friends to go have a cigarette outside. Leaned up against the brick wall with his eyes closed he heard not only a familiar voice, but his favorite voice.

"Glad you're still here, was hoping to a have few too many and be a little naughty." Brian said with a smile. His voice was clearly cracking and his eyes were still puffy, but he did his best to convince Roger he was okay.

Roger was smart enough not to ask, his date only started an hour ago and Brian's face read depressed despite his smile.

"Thank God you're here. Been striking out left and right tonight. Need me my trusty wing man. But first, shots?" Roger said stomping out his cigarette. 

"Rog, I'll do shot after shot till I don't know my name. But can we just hang the two of us?" Brian said quietly. Brian is very tall but in this moment he feels so small and vulnerable. He knows Roger likes to leave with someone every night. Roger smile and gave Brian a reassuring nod before they went back inside.

The boys sat at the bar, pounding shots and beers like it was their job. Chatting about everything they could think of until they were both properly smashed. Roger watched Brian's lips as he talked about something in space that Roger didn't understand. Roger never had any idea what Brian was talking about, but he still loved to listen. He loved how Brian's eyes lit up and how his voice went just a bit higher. Roger wished he was as smart as Brian so he could participate but listening was just as good.

"Sorry, I'll shut up now. We just learned this during the last lecture and I've been wanting to talk about it since then." Brian said swishing his glass in his hands. 

"Bri, I may not be able to contribute to the conversation but I love listening to you talk about Space and time and things I'll never smart enough to understand. But wait, you're last lecture was Monday, you haven't talked Alan's ear off about this?" Roger said wide eyed. He always loved how Brian comes to him first.

"Roger you are smart and you know that. So please quit with that nonsense. No actually. Didn't want to bore him to early but that didn't work seeing as he stood me up tonight. Waited 45 minutes, oh well. We needed a night the two of us, long over due I'd say." Brian said raising his glass before downing his pint.

"Ah he didn't deserve you anyway. Too bloody handsome for him." Roger said, immediately regretting saying that out loud.

"That must be the vodka talking, Rog." Brian said nervously laughing. "He was way out of my league. I was a bloody fool. Oh well, on wards and upwards."

Roger shook his head as both boys raised up their last shot of vodka and downing it eagerly. Roger really did think Brian was handsome, that didn't make him gay. He thought lots of blokes were good looking, he didn't want to sleep with them though. _That made the difference_, Roger tried to convince himself. Roger leaned forward to kiss Brian but quickly stopped himself but not before falling off his bar stool.

"Alright, I'm getting us both home before were both too drunk to function." Brian said picking the blond boy off the ground.

"Not even that drunk, just lost my balance you wanker!" Roger said playfully. Slightly thanking the universe and gravity and all that science stuff Brian talks about that he fell, he knew Brian wouldn't want to kiss someone like Roger. Not that it mattered because Roger wasn't gay.

Their walk home was longer than they remembered and the temperature has significantly dropped. Brian put his arm around Roger's shoulder to pull him in tight. To keep each other warm, obliviously. Not because he thought Roger was beautiful and he definitely had a crush on him. No definitely not that. But when Roger wrapped his arm around Brian's waist, Brian nearly went into cardiac arrest. But they were always like this, it happens when you grow up with someone. They stayed like that for most of the walk until Roger dropped his hand and Brian was brought back to reality. 

"Bri, what's that?" Roger asked pointing to the sky.

Brian smiled at him and started describing some constellation or something. Roger waited until Brian was fully engaged in what he was talking about to slip his hand into Brian's hand. Brian stopped talking for a moment but then continued on. Brian try to keep talking but his heart was beating so loud and fast that the couldn't even hear what he was saying. It didn't help that Roger kept squeezing his hand and rubbing his thumb against him. Brian was never so glad to see the front entrance to their crappy building. He got inside the building dropping Roger's hand and racing up the three flights of stairs to go into him room. He knew it would take Roger a little bit longer to get up them since his legs were shorter and he was a good bit drunker thank Brian.

Brian sat on his bed trying to convince himself that Roger was just comforting him after his bad day. Roger is a good friend always has been. He heard Roger knock on his door. He knew he didn't have to say come in, Roger always let himself in. And if the door was locked, Roger threatened to bust it down.

"If we're gonna race you have to let me know. It's cheating if don't you wanker." Roger said sitting next to Brian on the bed.

"M'not racing, Rog. Had a crap day and now I'm drunk and want to sleep." Brian said turning to Roger.

Both boy stared at each other for what felt like a life time. Brian would never get over just how beautiful Roger is. Effortlessly beautiful, Brian had to give 200% just to look even half as good as Roger. Brian could feel his face flushing and his heart racing. Any and all blood in his body was in his dick. He tried to calm his breaths so Roger wouldn't notice. But none of that was worked because Roger was staring at his hard member in his pants.

"You really think you're gonna sleep with this?" Roger asked in a cheeky tone and he grazed his palm over Brian's cock.

Brian wanted so bad to move his hand because he knew Roger was straight. He didn't need Roger to tease him like this. But just as Brian looked down to move Roger's hand away, he noticed the tent forming in Rogers pants.

"Rog- FUCK, you don't have to humor me mate." Brian said. Roger palmed his hard cock and it knocked the wind out out of him.

"Not humoring you." Roger said firmly as he leaned forward, grabbing Brian's face lightly and pulling him in for a kiss.

Brian had his hand resting on Rogers waist, thumbing circles into his hip bone, maybe a little too hard. No, definitely too. Brian waited until Roger opened up his mouth more, inviting him to slide his tongue in Roger's mouth. Swirling their tongues together, letting out small moans. Brian used his free hand to grab the back on Rogers head, pulling him in as close as he could and slightly pulling his hair. Brian always thought Roger was beautiful, but the sounds coming from Roger were absolutely beautiful. Brian would never admit out loud or even to himself he wanked off before to the thought of Roger. He always wondered how Roger would sound and now he was hearing it. It made him dizzy and harder than he has ever been. Feeling Roger tighten his grip on his cock was better than any shag he's ever had.

Roger pulled away first, eye's glazed over and lips swollen. He stared at Brian, waiting for him to say something. The only thing Roger could think of was how kissing Brian felt better than any girl he kissed. But Roger wasn't gay, he just liked Brian as a friend and sometimes friends kiss. _Sure. I'll go with that,_ he thought to himself.

"Rog, have you ever kissed a bloke before?" Brian asked. He had no idea what to say but he definitely didn't want to say that. He knew Roger never did.

"No, never thought about it. But I'd like to kiss you again, right now." Roger said, mentally slapping himself for how eager he sounded. He wasn't even gay. He stood up from the bed and gestured Brian to take his trousers and shirt off and to keep moving back until his back was against the headboard. Roger took his trousers and shirt off, climbed on the bed, making his way to Brian, and straddled his lap. Brian looked at him and cupped his face.

"Roger if you're doing this because you're drunk or I had a bad day, don't. I'm really fine just having myself a wank." Brian said, he hoped Roger didn't hear the desperation in his voice. He could feel Rogers hard member and knew he wanted this too. Maybe he wasn't 100% convinced but he was 100% horny. He kept pushing his hips up to rub his cock against Roger, desperately looking for any friction.

"Oh Brimi. Why would you wank yourself off? When we can be naughty boys and wank each other off?" Roger said he a devilish grin.

Before Brian could respond Roger was kissing him, this time it was dirtier. Both boys grabbing at skin or hair, whatever they could get to. Roger was grinding down on Brian's cock. The two layers on pants made it not as comfortable, it was such a relief to Brian. He pulled Roger close and used his free hand to play with his nipple. Roger let out a high pitched moan into Brian's mouth.

"More, Bri. Need more." Roger begged. Sounding desperate, he never begged any girl he was with. _I'd beg Bri to touch me any day_, Roger thought to himself.

"Yeah, need more already? This isn't enough?" Brian said pulling his nipple harder than he should have. He sounded confident but he was nervous. He didn't want to push Roger, but he also wanted to push him.

Roger let out a whine, both in pain and pleasure. Brian just smirked to himself. It was nice seeing his loud mouth and arse of a friend squirming at his disposal. Brian leaned Roger back a bit and leaned down to lick the other nipple he wasn't playing with. Biting every so gently then proceeding to kiss it. Roger kept spitting out how good it felt, barely making a sentence. He just kept grinding down on Brian's cock. He completely forget his dick has been neglected this whole time. Brian loved that he was losing it, almost a little too much.

"Bri, wanna touch you. Want you to- FUCK. Want you you to touch me. Not gonna last much longer." Roger said completely breathless.

Brian gestured for him to move up so he could get his cock out. He pulled out Rogers cock before pulling him back down between his legs. Brian grabbed Roger's cock and started stroking it, while the blond did the same to him. Both boys started aggressively thrusting into each other hands. Brian started kissing the younger boys neck, biting every so often, and definitely sucking way too hard. The room was filled with the obscene noises coming from Roger's Mouth, the noise of the boys wanking each other off, and the bed rattling ever so slightly. Brian was taking it all in. Painfully aware that this was probably a one time thing and he needed to burn it into his memory. 

Both boys thrusts became sloppier and the wrist movements were even sloppier. Brian didn't want to come first, so he worked his hand hard and faster. He slid his thumb over Roger's slit, getting a low moan from him.

"Bri gonna-" Roger started but didn't finish before he was coming into Brian's hand. 

Rogers grip started to falter but that didn't matter to Brian. Seeing Roger come was enough to push him through his own orgasm. He spilled into Roger's hand. Both boys were a sticky mess, short of breath, and leaning against one another. Roger went completely limp so Brian got up first to get a warm wash cloth to clean them up. When he came back into the room, Roger was on his back, still catching his breath.

Brian wiped himself down first, put on a clean pair of briefs before kneeling on the bed to clean up Roger. Roger laid there, eyes closed and humming to himself as Brian wiped him clean.

"Don't worry, I'll clean you up. Clean up after you all day long." Brian said in a fake stern voice.

"You love it." Roger said opening his eyes. 

"Maybe a little. Now either move over or move out, I'm laying down and going to sleep." Brian said hoping into his bed.

Brian secretly wanted Roger to stay, he knew the morning would come and they would go back to normal. So he wanted whatever he could get before sunrise. 

"Not getting rid of me that fast." Roger said wrapping an arm and leg around Brian. He was still naked and hoped that Brian didn't mind his flaccid dick touching him.

Brian was asleep in moments and Roger laid there awake. Tracing his fingers around Brian's naked chest, peppering kisses, and savoring every moment.

***

Brian woke up and noticed three things immediately: He was definitely laying in dried come, his head was pounding, and Roger was gone. He was annoyed that he would have to wash his sheet, he just did yesterday. He couldn't even process getting up to take a pain killer with how bad his head hurt. He was definitely not upset that Roger was gone. He laid down for a bit before realizing he's gonna have to face Roger sooner or later. He stripped the bed, he totally didn't smell the sheet, breathing in Roger's scent. He put on a fresh sheet and changed into his lounge clothes. He finally gathered the courage to leave his room and make his way to the kitchen. He poured himself a glass of water, popped two pain killers, and chugged the water. Then he chugged three more. 

"Why don't you just drink straight from the faucet?" Roger said, he was sitting on the couch. Looking at Brian with a cheeky grin.

"Shit, scared me you wanker!" Brian said. His back was pressed against the sink and he kept trying to get further back. It was no use unless he wanted to stand in the sink.

Roger had gone back to his coursework and Brian just watched him. Should he bring it up? Did Roger not remember? Or worse, did Roger remember and regret it? He probably hated Brian. Thought Brian was one of those gay men who pushed themselves on straight men. Maybe he thought Brian's dick was weird. Brian had a normal dick but maybe Roger didn't like it. Maybe nothing happened and Brian had a very vivid wet dream. _FUCK_, Brian screamed on repeat in his own head.

"Brimi, come help me with this. Need that bright head of yours." Roger said not looking up.

"Is my dick weird?" Brian blurted like work vomit. He's not sure why he said that. He didn't care what Roger thought of his dick. He wondered how hard he would have to bash his head off the counter for him to pass out. _Probably not too hard_, he thought.

"What?" Roger said more confused than anything.

"What?" Brian shot back.

"I'm not gay, Bri." Roger said standing up.

"After last night, I have a hard time believing that." Brian snarled back. He no longer cared if Roger regretted it or thought his dick was weird. Brian was more upset that Roger was denying that he was clearly gay. Typical Roger.

"Brian, you had a bad day and I had a bad day. Two friends wanking each other off to blow off steam doesn't mean that they're gay. I know you're gay, but I'm not. Don't make a big deal out of it. I had fun, but you're chest is missing tits. And no Bri, I don't think you're dick is weird. It's nice, but I prefer female anatomy. With that being said, come here and help me so I don't fail this exam." Roger said. He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince himself or Brian more. 

"Sorry, I didn't want to be weird about it. Thanks for helping me out. Tonight I'll be your wing man and help you find a naughty girl. But only if you find me a naughty boy." He said wiggling his eyebrows and walking over to Roger.

"Deal! The naughty boys are back!" Roger said clapping his hands together.

Brian got his answer and he was okay with it. Not happy or sad, OK. He knew the answer from the beginning but it doesn't mean that he was prepared for it. They would just go back to their normal lives of Brian yelling at Roger to clean up or calling him out for not using a real word during scramble. Roger trying to hook Brian up with some random bloke at the pub and throwing shit around the flat whenever he got angry over something stupid. Brian was okay with normal. Roger is his best friend and loved him. He would never do something that could change that.

***

Everything returned to normal and they never really spoke about it again. Roger made Roger comments but that was expected. Like on Monday when Brian wasn't expecting Roger to get out of class early. Brian was naked making a sandwich. He liked to air out after his shower, sue him. Roger walked in the door and Brian grabbed the cutting board to try to cover his exposed dick. "Not like I haven't seen it before." Roger said laughing while walking to get a drink. Brian hated how casual Roger was but also loved it because it saved Brian from having to be the casual one. 

Roger has brought home girls since that night and Brian didn't mind. He was kissing blokes in pubs, going on dates, and hooking up with guys too. Brian didn't hook up as often as Roger before and things slowed down even more after they wanked each other off. It had nothing to do with Roger. He was busy with class, he wanted to play his guitar more, no one caught his eye, and the ones that did catch his eye got bored of him rather quickly. None of this was new to Brian and he figured to avoid the humiliation and just ease up of talking to guys. He was use to it. But the nights Brian was working on homework or trying to write music, were always the night Roger stumbled in with some lanky, flat chested, brunette. Not that Brian was putting down the women he brought him, they were pretty. But Roger always said he liked blondes with big tits. It was hard to study or write a damn cord when he heard moaning coming from Roger's bedroom. Those were the night he went out for a walk, usually ending up a local gay pub. About half the time he ended up hooking up with some bloke. Nothing ever came from it like how Brian wanted. He wanted a relationship. He wanted to be domesticated. He wanted to feel love and wanted. But that wasn't the case, so coursework and guitar.

A few weeks after that night, the stars aligned and the boys were able to go out together. Brian had been living in the library studying for his exams, driving himself mad. He hadn't picked up his guitar in weeks. He hadn't seen Roger for a few days either. He missed his rage filled mate. Roger told him the name of the pub to meet him at and Brian was so excited. Brian was bouncing with excitement all day, he could barely focus during class or work. He wanted to tell Roger about his latest lecture and a song he started writing during the day. Roger always listened, even if Brian bored him. He walked to the pub, straightening himself up before walking in. He wore a floral blouse his mate Freddie recently purchased for him and a pair of black jeans. He felt a little out of his comfort zone, but hey why not.

He walked in scanning the crowd for Roger, finding him seated at the bar. He had his legs stretched out onto the chair next to him. He always loved how Roger saved him a seat, even if people yelled at him for it. Brian called out for Roger's attention and Roger's face lit up.

"Brimi!" He shouted handing Brian a shot glass.

Brian took the shot and when he finished he was given another one.

"Rog, I feel like I haven't seen you in forever." Brian said smiling.

Roger nodded with a grin. They started chatting, catching up on everything they missed out on. Once boys had the liquid courage they needed, they started out to the dance floor. They were each others favorite wing man. Roger was particular on who he picked for Brian. He needed him to be as smart as Brian and as kind as Brian. It was almost an impossible task. Roger on the other hand wasn't picky when it came to girls. She just needed to be a female and that was it. Both boys found someone for one another and were doing their job of talking the other one up. 

It wasn't long before Brian and was at the bar with a brunet with long brown hair and beautiful green eyes, his name was John. He was incredibly kind, shy, but also a little cheeky. Brian liked him very much. He listen to Brian talk about space and asked him half a dozen questions, real questions too. He wasn't just humoring him, he was genuinely interested. Brian tested the waters by leaning in closer, putting his hand on his arm, and eventually moving in closer. John seemed nervous but leaned in closer too. 

"John, I hate to be forward but I just want to say you are absolutely beautiful." Brian said with a smile.

"Oh stop Brian, you don't have to lie. But I think you are breathtaking." John said smiling. Brian noticed the crinkles by his eyes and was simply in awe. 

"I would like too kiss you." Brian said. He didn't mean now, he knew they couldn't kiss each other in the pub. Not unless they wanted to get their asses kicked. 

Brian grabbed John's hand and they went out in the back alley. Brian gently pushed John against the cold bricks, cupped his face, and kissed his lips. John's lips tasted wonderful and Brian couldn't get enough of it. John couldn't either, he pulled Brian closer. Moaning into his mouth, letting Brian put his tongue in his mouth. After a minute, they pulled away from each other. Lips swollen, pupils blown, and both out of breath, just standing there in silence.

"I'm sorry I got hard from a simple make out session. I uh, I recently started dating guys. Like a 7 months ago, so it's all new. I’m not really looking to jump into anything without getting to know them first." John kept rambling. Brian could tell he was nervous and it only made him look at him with more awe.

"John, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do." Brian gave him a comforting smile.

"Thanks. I like you, you're funny and smart. Not to mention beautiful. Can we take things slow? Like get to know each other and go on dates? Nothing serious, just nervous." John asked in a shy tone.

"Of course. Tea on Monday? There's a place around the corner from here." Brian said. Before john could respond, Roger flew open the back door to the alley.

"What the fuck Brian? You just leave me? Can we go home please?" Roger shouted running over to them.

"Sorry John. Noon on Monday?" Brian asked. John nodded yes and he gave him a hug goodbye.

Roger may have set Brian up with John but he was still a little jealous that Brian had a date planned. The girl he was chatting with blew him off, she said he kept talking about Brian too much. Of course he talked about Brian. He's his best friend, he's super smart, interesting and beautiful. Her loss if she didn't want Roger or want to listen to Roger talk about Brian. The boys walked home and Brian mentioned his date with John. Told him about how John is recently out and wants to be friends first before anything else. Roger snorted at that and Brian ignored him. He was excited but wasn't getting his hopes up. He might not even show up or he might not even see him after tea. Brian was in a weird mood and Roger caught on. 

Once they got back to the flat they crashed their lips together and collapsed on the couch. A kiss turned into a heated make out session and ended with the boys wanking each other off to completion. Roger laid on top of Brian, out of breath. He reached for Brian's hand and Brian opened up his hand for him to hold. 

"Rog-" Brian started.

"Not gay Brian, struck out tonight with that girl. I could see the semi you were sporting when I tore you away from John. Figured I helped you out since John didn't. Who gives someone a hard on then says 'Not ready to go further', wanker if you ask me." Roger said. He definitely wasn't trying to talk John down so Brian would like him less.

"Shut it Roger. Get up and let's get clean before you get stuck to me. That would be annoying." Brian said laughing while pushing Roger up.

"You'd love if I was stuck to you. But I guess we'll go our own ways." Roger said dramatically getting up to go clean off.

Roger wiped himself down then tossed the damp cloth to Brian. Brian cleaned himself out the best he could. Roger stood there staring at him and Brian could feel his eyes on him. He felt his body tense up. Even though Roger had just wanked him off and had saw him naked before that. Brian looked back at Roger and threw the damp cloth at his face. Roger made a fake disgusted face, walked to his room, and gave Brian an air kiss before shutting the door. Brian stood there feeling different. He felt a little used, but he also used Roger. It was weird. Maybe Roger was right, two mates wanking each other off to blow off steam was no big deal. Roger wasn't gay. Brian chuckled at himself. Roger was definitely was. But he'll let him figure that out for himself.

**

The weekend flew by and it was finally time for Brian's date with John. He had to leave straight from class so he didn't look his best. He had on a tighter t-shirt, light blue jeans, and his clogs. He looked casual, a little too casual for tea. But it'll have to do. He was running late and was pissed at himself. He was never late. John was waiting for him outside with a nervous look on his face. The nervousness fell as soon as he saw Brian.

"Thought you were standing me up for the blond." John said with a grin.

"Still very sorry about that. He's my best mate and the biggest pain in my arse. Let's go on." Brian said opening the door for him.

Brian and John ordered their tea and pastries. Brian paid for the both of them, he was a gentleman after all. They sat down in the corner getting to know one another. Brian talked about science, his guitar, his clogs, and Roger. Those seemed to be the only things he could think of. He quickly finished talking about himself before John could grow tired of him. John told him about his engineering classes, how he recently came out and had a bad ex-boyfriend, his love for dancing, how he's building his own amp, he likes to write a new bass riff once a week and how he loves too cook. Brian sat in awe listening to this beautiful and interesting man speak. Watching the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled and laughed. John must have caught him staring.

"Sorry if I'm talking too much, you're just a great listener." John said picking up his tea cup.

"I could listen to you talk all day." Brian said with a smile.

The date continued on until John had to leave for his shift. Brian was sad but understood. They planned to meet up again on Friday for drinks. Brian asked if Freddie and Roger could come since he already had plans with them. John nodded eagerly and made a comment about how he was excited to meet his friends. They hugged each other goodbye and they parted ways. Brian couldn't help but smile as he walked down the street. He was quite taken with John, he didn't want to think ahead but he had a good feeling about this. He walked back to his flat, excited to tell Roger how well his date went. He walked through the front door of their flat and it was trashed. He could hear Roger screaming followed by a crash and a bang.

"Roger what the bloody hell? Why are my clothes in the living room?” Brian shouted picking up is clothes.

"I can't find my shirt Brian, I swear to God if you have it I'm throwing you out the window!" Roger said from his room.

Brian looked down and realized he was wearing Roger's shirt, FUCK. He tried to quickly take it off. Roger had walked into the room and locked eyes with Brian. Before Brian could say anything Roger was running full speed at him. He knocked Brian over ripping the shirt off of him. Brian didn't know if he was being serious or joking around. He was afraid to figure it out.

"You're always taking my clothes. They don't even fit you for fucks sake." Roger said as he finally pulled it off. Roger was pissed off, there was no humor in his voice.

"You're constantly putting your dirty clothes in my hamper because you're too god damn lazy to do your own laundry. If you did your own, I wouldn't end up with your clothes." Brian said pushing him off a little too harshly.

"Where the fuck were you anyways. Your class ended over two hours ago." Roger said changing the subject. 

He had started to clean up Brian's clothes off the ground. No matter how bad he trashed the place, he always cleaned up after himself. Mainly because Brian made it known that he wouldn't do it for him. Brian would wash his clothes, clean up the bathroom, but never after Roger had a temper tantrum.

"Tea with John, went really well. He's coming out with us Friday." Brian said keeping the conversation short.

Roger didn't respond to him, just gathered up Brian's clothes to bring to his room. Brian was hurt Roger didn't ask him questions or have any snarky Roger comments. He blamed it on the fact that Roger was probably tired from destroying the flat. Either way, Brian was over it. He sat in his room putting everything back where it belonged. He was annoyed with Roger for fucking up his room but he was used to it. He wasn't even a minute in before Roger nearly busted the door down. 

"You wore my favorite shirt on a date!?" Roger screamed at Brian.

"It's a fucking shirt Rog. You wear my briefs and socks. I don't fuck up your shit. God you're so childish sometimes. Honestly, are you proud of yourself? You don't even ask how my date went. I always ask how your hook up with some blue eyed floozy went." Brian mumbled on, folding his clothes back in his wardrobe.

Brian looked at Roger when he didn't say anything back. He just stared at the taller man. He figured Brian had snapped him out of this weird mood he was in today. When Roger still said and did nothing, Brian went back to folding. He wasn't expecting for Roger to tackle him again. They landed on the bed together. Brian rolled over so that he was hovering over Roger, he pinned his hands down into the mattress.

"Enough!" Brian shouted, "Get the stick out of your arse, Rog. You need to get laid. You didn't bring a girl home this weekend, is that why your so insufferable?"

"I'm sorry Brimi. Yeah, that's it. Embarrassing, huh?" Roger said biting his lower lip. He didn't know how tell Brian he was jealous of John. Not that Roger was gay, because he wasn't.

Brian leaned down to kiss Roger's lips, he wasted no time in being aggressive. Roger was acting like an arse and definitely needed a release Brian was happy to help him out, Roger always helped him out. Besides, if things worked out with John he wouldn't be doing this any longer. He ground his crotch onto Roger's, both boys getting hard rather quickly. Roger moaned into Brian's mouth and slowly slipped his tongue in the curly haired mans mouth. Brian tightened his grip Roger's wrist. Brian kept grinding down on Roger and the younger boy started sputtering out incoherent nonsense. Between the aggressive kissing and the grinding, He slipped his hand into Rogers pants, stroking him less than 10 times and Roger spilled into his hand and pants. Roger was embarrassed with how quick he came but couldn’t careless because he felt so good.. He laid there panting while Brian placed kisses up and down his neck, topping it off with one his lips. He let Roger lay there to collect himself and went back to folding his clothes.

_I'm so bloody gay_, Roger thought to himself. He sat up, ready to tell Brian he's gay and he thinks he might like Brian kinda really a lot. He looked over at Brian, seeing his more than semi hard cock straining his trousers. He moved over and got ready to tell him.

"Bri, I uh-. I'm-" Roger started

"I get it, you're not gay." Brian said with a small smile. This was the third time this has happened and he knew what Roger was gonna say.

"You didn't get off." Roger said. He felt bad for two reasons: Brian didn't come and Brian was clearly upset. Roger had snapped at Brian more times than not telling him that he's not gay.

"Wasn't about me, wanted to help you like you helped me. Go change out of your soiled trousers, I'll have myself a wank, and we can watch some crappy TV together." Brian said with a bigger smile. He was glad to help out his best mate. Roger smiled back and walked out of Brian's room.

***

The following week was awkward. The boys didn't cuddle like they usually did, there were no flirty innuendos, and Brian kept his distance from Roger. He wanted things to work with John and that meant no more wanking off his best mate. Roger was upset by the change in dynamics in their flat and friendship. He was all but ready to come out but Brian was acting cold towards him. So he figured to just not say anything.

Friday rolled around and they had maybe 5 conversations throughout the week. So Brian was surprised when Roger was dressed and ready to go out the pub. Everything was back to normal their walk to the pub. Roger was being Roger and Brian felt relaxed at the whole situation. He was nervous for John to meet his friends. Roger and Freddie are loud, dirty minded, and a bit crazy. Roger wrapped his arm around Brian's waist and Brian pulled him tighter. The air was cold, that's why they were doing this. They made it to the pub and Roger immediately went to the crowed bar to get drinks while Brian walked over to John and Freddie. He was a bit confused on how they knew each other, but he figured it was a good thing. One less friend he had to be nervous about.

"Hi John, see you met Freddie!" Brian said pulling him in for a hug.

"Where's your boyfriend?" Freddie asked, half joking and half very serious.

"What?" Brian asked letting go of John.

"You could have told me you had a thing going with Roger. I wouldn't have cared. I don't want to be strung around." John said. He wasn't mad, just wanted everything out in the open.

"What?" Brian said again. He couldn't even thing of everything else to say. Yeah, before he wanted to be with Roger. But that was before and this is now.

"Oh come on, John and I met each other yesterday in the library and we both came to the conclusion that you two were together. You never shut up about each other." Freddie said, he didn't understand what Brian didn't get.

"I haven't met Roger other than that one time but he clearly likes you. And you talk a lot about him. Think you should go for him. We made out and went on one date. It was nice but clearly not meant to be. I'd like to still be your friend, though." John said with big smile. 

"You should hear how Roger talks about Brian. Been watching these fools go back and fourth for about two years now." Freddie told John. 

"Roger's not even-." Brian started.

"Roger's not even what? Anyways, that blonde over there with the skirt, pretty fit right?" Roger said with a cheeky grin and four beers in his hands.

He clearly missed the conversation and Brian's heart went from hopeful to broken. He listened to Roger talk about they busty blonde and he watched Freddie pull John close to him. John seemed to melt into his touch, Brian couldn't blame him. He'd pick Freddie over himself any day. Freddie was handsome, charming, and just a vibrant ball of energy. Brian was the exact opposite. _Freddie clearly planted those things about Roger in John's head so he could steal John away from him_, Brian thought. Probably not, they clearly looked like they belonged together. Brian was happy if they were happy. Besides, he only made out with him and went on one date. Nothing serious, he was hurt. But he was used to it.

"What the fuck Fred, Brian is here with John!" Roger snapped at Freddie. John was nearly sitting on Freddie's lap.

"I thought you were here with Brian, darling." Freddie said tilting his head.

"He's not bloody gay!" Brian said storming out the bar before anyone else could say anything and walking home. He didn't even catch what Roger's face looked like, but he was probably disgusted at the thought of being Brian's date.

Brian didn't care to look back. He was pissed at Freddie, sorta. He felt like shit for what he had clearly done to John. He was mad at himself for being so insecure. He made it back to the flat in record timing, probably because he didn’t have Roger holding him back. He went straight his room, collapsing on the bed and trying to comprehend what the hell happened tonight. Freddie and John met yesterday, they hit it off and both agreed that him and Roger like each other. Or at least he likes Roger. Freddie didn’t steal John, John was never his. He’s okay with that. John is a cool bloke, he’s lucky he gets to be his friend. That part is taken care of. Now, Roger was definitely not 100% straight. He was at least bi, he has to be. No straight man volunteers to wank off his friend. But that didn’t mean he likes Brian, and he was okay with that. He came to the conclusion that he has to end this “friends who wank each other off” thing. He’s not gonna be able to move on if he thinks there is a slight change Roger wants to be with him. Okay, he was done with that.

Brian was slightly at peace with everything that happened tonight. He felt a weight off his chest and felt calm. He knew that wouldn’t last long when he heard the front door fly open followed by “Brimi!”. He’s only been home for half an hour, which meant Roger probably only had two beers and walked home. He laid on his bed not moving waiting for Roger to bust through the door. 15 seconds last the blond boy almost busted the door down. He stood in the doorway with a pissed off look on his face.

“Sorry Bri! I would have been here sooner but I was busy yelling at Fred and John. Cannot believe those two wankers.” Roger said not moving from his place.

“It’s fine Rog, I’m actually happy and hope they work out. Fred is good for John. I didn’t have high hopes for a relationship but now I got a new mate and he plays bass. Everything happens for a reason!” Brian said truthfully.

Roger looked at him with hesitation, not fully believing him. But he also knew Brian would have been crying if he was really heartbroken, he was very sensitive. He finally gave in and laid down next to Brian, both looking at the ceiling.

“What’s wrong with me? Be honest Roger. Pretend you don’t know me and we met at the pub.” Brian said, his voice was monotone.

“Brian, what the hell? You have got to be kidding me. There’s nothing wrong with you other than the fact that you keep your peanut butter in the fridge.” Roger said sitting up.

“I go on dates like a proper gentleman, I’m either stood up or never hear from them again. I have to approach blokes when I’m out, no one chats me up. I know I’m complaining and sound pathetic but I just wanna know. You have it so easy, everyone wants to be with you. I know I’m not very good looking and dull but for fuck sake's someone has to like me for me, right?” Brian said, still looking up

“Brian shut the hell up. You have so much going for you, so much more than me. You know how many people at Uni ask me if you’re single? A lot Bri, it’s fucking weird at this point.” Roger said with his voice going a bit high.

“Why don’t you set me up with them?”

“Cos none of them are good enough for you. None of them are gonna appreciate how kind you are. They’ll take advantage of your kindness. None of them are gonna appreciate how smart you are without being cocky. Or maybe they are just after your body, you got those crazy long legs. They probably are hoping that your cock is also long. It’s annoying. ‘Hey I heard Brian is still single’ I tell them you’re not and to piss off!” Roger said, he could feel himself getting worked up

“Roger that is not your place to speak for me!” Brian shouted, still laying down. He could feel his rage starting to boil over. Roger was an arse usually but this was just a little over the line.

“Bri, they aren’t gonna appreciate you like I do.” Roger said. He meant in a romantic way but he knew Brian only thought of him as a friend.

“Well you’re not gonna suck my cock.” Brian snorted. He quickly realized what he said and wanted to apologize for being so vulgar. Not that Roger wasn’t the most vulgar person he ever met.

Before Brian could say something to fill the silence, Roger was aggressively pulling down Brian’s trousers and pants. He lifted his hips up to help Roger out since Roger was about to wank him off. Just that action alone was enough to get Brian hard. He got himself up on his elbows as he watched Roger give his cock a few strokes. Brian closed his eyes and let the soft moans escape his mouth. Roger leaned over to kiss at Brian’s open mouth, punching his tongue in it.

“Rog” Brian moaned throwing his head back.

“Gonna make you feel good. Gonna show you how you should be appreciated.” Roger moaned, kissing along his jaw, down his neck, chest, and to his cock.

Brian was too caught up in everything to tell Roger he didn’t have to do it, but at this point he knew Roger wouldn’t do it if he didn’t want to. Roger kissed down Brian’s cock to the head and back down the underside. Brian bucked his hips up and Roger place one hand on him to keep him still. He licked one stripe up before he started sucking the head of Brian’s cock.

“Fuck Rog. So good. Please.” Brian said, voice cracking.

Roger used Brian’s encouragement to to take him deeper in his mouth. Gliding his tongue around the thick cock in his mouth while using his other hand to stroke what wasn’t in his mouth. He picked up the pace while going a tab bit deeper every so often. He pulled back and started bobbing his head. Brian’s hands found their way to Roger’s blond hair, pulling gently. Roger hummed around Brian’s cock.

“Rog, gonna come. You don’t have to, FUCK.” Brian stammered as he came in Roger’s mouth.

Roger swallowed and gave Brian’s sensitive cock a few tugs before laying down next to Brian. Brian used the small energy he had left to pull out Roger’s cock and wanked him off. Roger came in Brian’s had after four sloppy strokes. Both boys laid on their backs, catching their breaths. After a few minutes, Brian broke the silence.

“Isn’t this the part where you tell me you’re not gay? Which is gonna be really hard for me to believe after that.” Brian said with a smirk. He knew the blond boy couldn’t see it.

“I’m gay Brian, super feckin gay. Have been for probably two years. Okay?” Roger said. He finally felt a little free after saying it out loud.

“I’m happy you finally realized it. I only realized after the first time you wanked me off.” Brian said pulling himself to the top of his bed so he could get so much needed sleep. Roger followed Brian and went to cuddle him before Brian stopped him. “I don’t think you should stay in here tonight.” Brian finished.

It’s not that he didn’t want Roget and him to cuddle all night, he did. But he also wanted to stroke Roger’s back, make him breakfast, hold his hands and go on dates. But he knew that them hooking up was Roger’s way of coming out and now that he’s out Roger would probably go find a nice handsome bloke. Someone better than Roger.

“Yeah, you’re probably right. Thanks Bri.” Roger said getting off the bed and collecting his clothes.

Roger felt dirty, not the good kind. From the moment Roger knew he was gay, he knew he didn’t have a chance with Brian. But being his friend would have to be just as good. So when this wanking thing started, Roger thought that he could prove to Brian that he was good enough for him. But that didn’t work and Roger’s heart was shattered. He crawled into his bed and tried to not cry as he fell asleep.

***

The next morning Brian woke up and wanted to jump out the window. He had the opportunity to tell Roger how he felt but instead he kicked him out. Nice move, Brian thought to himself. He took a shower, put on fresh clothes, and went to make himself and Roger a nice cuppa. A nice cuppa made everything better. He started the kettle and sat down at their crap kitchen table. Roger heard him in the kitchen and decided to join the curly haired boy. Roger placed his head on Brian’s shoulder while they waited for the kettle to whistle. Once it did, Brian got up to make them their tea. Too much sugar and a splash of milk for Roger and a sprinkle of sugar and milk for himself. He placed the cuppa in front of Roger with a smile. The blond boy gave a broken smile back.

“Brimi?” Roger said not looking up from his tea. Brian gave him a simple ‘Mhm’ to let him know that he was listening.

“I know it took me a while to come out, but I think I was avoiding it because I knew you wouldn’t want to be with me. I could deal with me being in the closet and being your friend. But I couldn’t deal with you rejecting me. I’ve been trying to show you how much I appreciate you by being there for you, wanking you off, I even took out books from library about space so I know what the hell you’re talking about. So when you tell me that no one wants to be with you and you put yourself down it drives me mad. Cos I’m right here, I’m crazy about you. But cos I’m not smart enough, not clean enough, or my temper is too much you don’t wanna be with me. That’s fine you don’t have to be with me, your choice. So just know the next time you can’t wrap your head around why I’m single just know I’ve been waiting for you.” Roger said slowly, making sure Brian heard every word.

Brian stared at Roger, clinging to everything the younger boy was saying to him. He wanted to pick him up, hold him, and kiss him everywhere. But he knew they needed to get everything out on the table.

“Rog, you’re too good for me. I’m feckin crazy about you. I only kicked you out last night because if you stayed I would have told you how I felt and I didn’t want you to laugh in my face. You are a damn angel and I’m not. I just FUCK, I just want to be with you.” Brian said.

Roger stood up and launched himself at Brian. He knew that Brian would always catch him. He plastered his lips to Brian’s and Brian kissed him back forcefully. He picked up Roger and let the younger boy wrap his legs around his waist. Roger broke the kiss first and spoke first.

“Brimi, you’re the smart one. What caused our final breakthru?” Roger asked him

“Just had to make our feelings know towards each other and turn our hearts inside and out for each other. Just want to see you smile, Rog. And what did I say about you not calling yourself smart!’ Brian said kissing his forehead.

Roger jumped out of his arms and ran to the desk in the living area. Scrambling to write something down on a piece of paper. Brian stood there confused.

“We’ll make love in a minute. You said John plays bass right? Let’s have him play for us and get the band back together. I have a fantastic idea for a song,” Roger said holding a piece of paper with a few lyrics written on it. The name at the top read “Breakthru”


End file.
